‘No apologies and no explanations necessary’ a keynote with Sahara Herald, Tour Director at Frontier Touring
Well hello Ladies!
It’s very nice to be here this morning knowing that for once I’m not the token woman on the panel!
I’ve been asked to speak over the last few years at various events and it’s often simply an invitation to a sausage sizzle.
Firstly, I wanted to acknowledge the traditional owners of this land, the Gadigal people of the Eora nation, and I pay my respect to elders past, present and emerging.
Secondly, thank you to all the wonderful women who have worked tirelessly and often without thanks behind the scenes to put this together today and provided us with the safe space and time to connect with each other, to feast, to celebrate, to commiserate, and to enjoy the beautiful performances. Thank you for the invitation to speak and a BIG thank you to all of you for turning up and taking part.
I took a moment to reflect last night on what has happened for me personally since the last One of One International Women’s Day breakfast a year ago.
I’ve had a BIG twelve months on lots of levels, notching up my first full year in my new position as Tour Director.
· I also turned 50 last May, a milestone that many, including myself, thought I might not make.
· In September I was outed publicly in The Australian as a recovering alcoholic and drug addict just before I subsequently gave a raw and for me a somewhat harrowing keynote speech at BIGSOUND. That speech unexpectedly touched a nerve for many in the industry and certainly became a conversation starter in the months to come.
· I took part in a gruelling four-hour long interview that formed one of the cornerstones of the acclaimed 5 part Big Day Out J FILES podcast that went to air in October.
· In November I took part in the Support Act Prevention Summit which was held with the aim of establishing new pathways in the journeys of those in the industry that are struggling with fatigue, burn out, mental health, and addiction issues amongst other things.
· In January I celebrated 6 years of unbroken sobriety, something I commit to on a daily basis and I take full responsibility for, but I do not do without your support. I’ve chosen to be very public about being sober in the hope it might open the door to others in our industry, particularly women, who may be struggling and want to seek help.
· And just the other week my darling daughter Drew turned 18 and thankfully her biggest priority was not hitting the town but enrolling to vote.
Voting is such a powerful action. I still remember the first time I voted I was very emotional and I still get very teary every time I vote as I reflect that it is a privilege I have here in Australia that so many women around the world still do not share. I also pause to reflect on our foremothers that fought for that fundamental right for us, and those that actually died in the battle and those that continue to campaign, fight and sometimes die to further the rights of women.
I see what is happening around the world politically and it deeply disturbs me. The old, white conservative men who are currently ruling the world and determinedly chipping away at our rights and status, in particular the governance over our own bodies and reproductive rights.
So please value your right to vote, it is a precious thing to be used wisely.
So anyway, I’ve had a busy year! All this while juggling a demanding job and gruelling travel schedule, personally directing over 20 different tours, helping my elderly and ailing parents, keeping countless Recovery commitments, maintaining a lovely long distance relationship, and consistently neglecting to tidy my room.
But there was one very special highlight from the past 12 months that caught me completely off guard. In September, Frontier announced a tour I’d been working towards with the wonderful, predominantly female AEG team in America behind performer JOJO SIWA. For those who don’t have female relatives under the age of 13, JoJo is a Nickelodeon reality star that in 2019 took her show on the road and became a certifiable all singing all dancing global superstar. Now, I’ve actually always taken some pride in thinking of myself of indie rock chick at heart. The morning of the JoJo tour announcement my partner sent me a screen shot of me and PJ Harvey, jokingly implying a question of “what happened, you used to be cool?”. My ego got a little bruised wondering what I was doing working on something that was such a big departure from my usual stomping ground. But the ticket sales were phenomenal, so I justified it to myself as a way to offset working on “cooler” projects that maybe weren’t quite as financially successful.
But when it came to the first show in Brisbane, I had a fundamental change in perspective. I was down at front turnstiles as the venue opened the gates, quietly watching the masses come in. And it was predominantly mothers accompanying a flurry of excited young girls. And I mean EXCITED. The anticipation in the air was palpable, as was the sense of wonder and slight trepidation on their young faces. And it suddenly dawned on me that a vast majority of them were at their very first live concert.
What an incredible thing that is to bear witness to and be a part of, knowing that this was hopefully the start in a lifetime journey of loving live entertainment. They are literally the punters of the future that will keep our industry alive.
It was especially poignant for me that their first concert experience was watching another young woman on stage, completely owning her identity, owning her enthusiasm, owning her success and her owning her own business, without any apologies.
Because I know like many of the women here today, I’ve spent a lot of my life apologising. Apologising for being too smart, too loud, too tall, too thin, to fat, too opinionated, too feisty, too bossy, too good, too bad, Too Fucking Right. Subconsciously learning to temper my language so I don’t cause offence, or threaten, or question or call someone out for not giving me due credit, or due time, or due space, or due respect or due pay. All because I am a woman.
I’ve reflected on my words from other speeches I’ve done in the past, and I’ve been somewhat saddened that I’ve sometimes felt the need to give space and thanks to others as a way of appeasing people’s expectations, ego or potential anger, almost apologetic for my position in life and overrunning with gratitude just for being allowed to sit at the table.
Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for the opportunities that through my own hard work I have turned into success and for the support I have received along the way, especially in my hours of darkness. At the same time, I’m ever mindful that not all of us feel we have a voice, or that we get the opportunities we want or deserve no matter how hard we work or how skilled or how passionate we are.
And I stand here today acutely aware of the level of privilege I have as a heterosexual, able bodied, well-educated, white woman living and working in the Eastern Suburbs of Sydney, with a relatively decent chance of being seen and heard despite being female.
So in having a voice, and a smidgen of perceived power, comes responsibility. Not to take anyone else’s voice or to speak for them, but to use my opportunities and audience to amplify yours.
Thus, I’m making a commitment to myself, to you and to us, not to unduly apologise, and to use my voice instead to speak up, to empower others, to include, to encourage, to discourage when necessary, to give credit where it’s due, to take credit where it’s due, to call out bad behaviour even if it’s my own, to be kind, to have boundaries, to be generous with my time, to teach, to be teachable, to say no, to say yes. To be me, just as I am, with no apologies and no explanations necessary.
It is so important that we support and encourage and nurture each other in our hopes, our disappointments, our aspirations and our enterprises. I have such admiration for women such as Mardi Caught and Johanna Greenway who said “NO THANKS, NOT GOOD ENOUGH” and stepped out on their own to forge their own flourishing paths and businesses. It disturbs me when we don’t celebrate each other’s successes or don’t give each other opportunities out of fear or jealousy, when we look at each other as competition to be despised, or discredited or disposed of.
Because there are so many amazing women in our industry that constantly inspire and encourage me, and are worth celebrating. And there should be room for all of us, not to feel like we’re the exception or the token woman in the room. I’m fortunate enough to work with some incredible women on a daily basis in the Mushroom Group, many of them are here with us this morning. Today I particularly wanted to turn the spotlight on my colleague, the astounding Susan Heyman, who is a stellar example of intelligence, authenticity, generosity and integrity. She has been such an incredible resource and ally for me this past year, I can’t thank her enough. It just so happens it’s Susan’s 40th Birthday today and she’s certainly got plenty to celebrate. And, in the only time I’m going to mention the M word today, Susan and I are both incredibly fortunate to work with two Michaels who have the wisdom and good business sense to honour and empower women within their companies to lead and to shine.
So I encourage you today to use your voice, to speak up, to hold that door open a little bit longer for another woman to come through and to let your spotlight shine a little wider on to the sisters beside you, because there’s room for all of us. Thank you.
